Kucing Gatal Speaks

Saturday, July 02, 2005

Cybersex: Then & Now

I logged into a Yahoo chatroom recently, after a long hiatus. Before I could even say hi, three personal messages popped up, all bearing the same message: Hi ... asl plz! Now I remember why I stopped going into these public chatrooms. They're dominated by these social desperadoes who aren't at all interested in getting to know you, they just want someone to join them for a quickie in cyberspace.

I remember when I first started chatting, back in the mid-90s. The Internet was a fascinating place. I marvelled at the fact that I could chat to people from thousands of miles away in real time, simultaneously. Back then, people were genuinely interested in forming cyber friendships, chatters were courteous, and flamers were few and far between. Or at least that's what my memory chooses to believe. You know how nostalgia is, it highlights the good and glosses over the bad.

Eventually, cybersex took off big time. People used chat rooms for hot and steamy conversations. But at least the beginning of the chat would still be decent, a chatter would pretend to make some small conversation before getting to the "good bits". Kucing Gatal has participated in her share of cybersex encounters (who hasn't?) but it was just a passing phase. It's really not a turn-on for me to pretend I'm having wild sex when in reality I'm sitting in front of a PC screen, staring at someone's words on a screen, words that are supposed to make me moan and squirm but in reality have no effect on me whatsoever. Here's a sample:

SmilyGuy: Hey there, how are you?
^Cat^: I'm fine, how about you?
SmilyGuy: I'm doing good. Are you a male or female? Where are you from?
^Cat^: I'm female, from Malaysia.
SmilyGuy: Hey, I had a uni mate from Malaysia! He was from this place called Penang, do you know it?

(And the conversation would go on for a bit, until invariably the guy would ask me what I look like. My answers depended on my mood. Some days I was 5'7, slim, long black hair, greenish brown eyes, and other days I was 5'2, 86kgs and had a punk hairstyle)

SmilyGuy: You sound sexy. Can I ask you a personal question?
^Cat^: Sure.
SmilyGuy: What are you wearing?

(Again, my answer to this standard question would vary).

^Cat^: Well, it's very hot here today, so I'm just wearing a tank top and shorts.
SmilyGuy: Mmmm, wish I could see you. Are you wearing any panties?
^Cat^: Yes, a pair of lacy black panties.
SmilyGuy: Now it's getting hot here too. Not to mention hard ...
^Cat^: Well, why don't you get comfortable?
SmilyGuy: I am, I just took off my pants and am sitting here in my boxers. Would you like to help me get even more comfortable?
^Cat^: What do I need to do?

(The naiver you are or pretend to be, the more they like it, these perverts)

SmilyGuy: Well, how about you slip your hand into my boxers and feel me. But before that, could you take off your clothes too? It's not fair that I'm only here in my underwear while you're clothed.
^Cat^: Ok give me a moment.

(I go away to get a drink and return)

^Cat^: Ok I'm back, and now I'm wearing nothing but my black panties.
SmilyGuy: Ohhhh I really wish I was next to you now. Come sit on my lap, baby.
^Cat^: Shall I sit facing you or away from you?
SmilyGuy: Sit facing me, so I can look at those pretty breasts of yours.
^Cat^: OK.
SmilyGuy: Slip your hand into my boxers, can you feel how hard and hot I am for you, baby? I'm touching your nipples now, do you like that?
^Cat^: Oh yes, I can feel you ... wow you're big!

(If you can't massage the real thing, massage their ego instead)

SmilyGuy: I'm kissing your breasts now, licking you, giving you pleasure... do you like it? Are you wet?
^Cat^: Oh yes baby, don't stop!

And the conversation would continue until inevitably the guy would type: "I'm coming, I'm coming .... aaaah ... oooh baby that was awesome!"

Pretty boring, isn't it? Then voice-enabled chat rooms started mushrooming. Mics became a popular computer accessory. Cybersex had a whole new dimension to it. Words are one thing, but words with sounds, now that heated things up quite a bit! And so cybersex became more interesting. Most of the time I would tell the guy that my mic was broken though, so it would be quite one-sided, which was fine with me, as I could continue watching TV while laughing at the poor bloke jerking off to my hot words onscreen.

There was once though, when I was merrily typing away, and the guy asked, "Why don't you say something?" "I don't have a mic," I responded. His answer: "How come I can hear you typing then?" I froze, and then realised I was using a friend's laptop which had a built in mic. That conversation ended very abruptly!

Eventually webcam prices fell, and became affordable to the average Joe. Now you could actually see who you were talking to. Kucing Gatal likes viewing people's cams. There are those who claim they are handsome on their profiles, but then turn out to look like the Hunchback of Notre Dame. Not that it bothers me what they look like, but if you're not good-looking, then don't claim to be, ok?

Sometimes though, you click on a guy's cam, and instead of seeing his face, you end up looking at his dong instead. Kucing Gatal has seen enough ugly dongs to last a lifetime.

And back to the present. Today, when I enter a chatroom, I am assaulted with a standard greeting. Some guys do away with the niceties altogether. They start off a conversation by asking: "Hi, what are you wearing?" The ruder ones just go: "Hi baby, wanna f*ck?"

Kucing Gatal is no longer interested in such conversations. Cybersex is a thing of the past for me. The real thing is so much better, don't you agree?

This has turned out to be an extra long post, so I'll save my real-life exploits for later. Till next time, this is Kucing Gatal signing out with a tired Meow.

10 Comments:

  • ROTFL!! I laughed, and laughed, and laughed in agreement with everything you said in ur post ;p Interesting... very interesting. Same thing happens in MIRC. Most of the time I'm not in the mood to be a female, so i don't play along. Like one of these days.

    I've friends (males) who pretended to be females and play along with the sex-deprived pervies in mirc.

    By Blogger narrowband, at July 02, 2005 1:15 PM  

  • hahaha..

    i think everybody who uses the internet now have those mIRC thingy history.

    me included.

    anyway, do they still exist?

    btw, i would like to link you up to my page. thats ok with you yeah?

    By Blogger Kaki Cucuk Langit, at July 02, 2005 1:37 PM  

  • Narrowband: Yup, actually that conversation took place in mIRC ... those were the days!

    Kaki Cucuk Langit: I think they still exist, yes, but like I said, it's very direct now, no more small talk before they launch into their gatal mode. As for linking to me, sure, go ahead :)

    By Blogger Kucing Gatal, at July 02, 2005 1:45 PM  

  • lmao. yeah i remember those early chat days in the 90s. Way more interesting when I first started out, then suddenly seems like all the perverts got internet access and everything deteriorated from there.

    Thanks for the trip

    By Blogger SBB, at July 02, 2005 5:45 PM  

  • ROTFLMAO...

    desperate punya jantan... :))

    By Blogger lynnee, at July 02, 2005 7:58 PM  

  • LOL.. you're bad! :p

    "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits."

    XD

    By Anonymous sTr|k3R, at July 03, 2005 12:56 AM  

  • Dear Kucing Gatal, ur blog is truly whiff of fresh air. I have a question for u. can u please tell me whether there is actaully such thing as "platonic friendship" between men & women )as in heterosexual males and females). it's been bugging me. help.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at July 03, 2005 1:45 AM  

  • HAHAHA!! good one!! its so darn true. thats precisely WHY i choose my chat partner. if u start the wrong way, u're blocked. nasib la..

    By Blogger mistyeiz, at July 05, 2005 8:50 AM  

  • hahaha......yeah modern technology do helps a lot in all these.

    By Blogger truth, at July 13, 2005 11:54 PM  

  • I read somewhere, that perhaps up to 20% of people in the sex channels of IRC are females... the rest are males, masquerading as females. Talk about gender imbalance.

    By Blogger xaph, at July 28, 2005 2:51 PM  

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